He was showing me one of his poems. He described a sunset as clouds surrounding the sun and swallowing it. For some reason it was terribly sad.
"The sun also rises," I offered.
"Indeed. Catherine, I need a sunrise from you."
"That is what I am offering," I said, smiling. He seemed so anxious, so uncertain. Perhaps he was ready for Christ. I wasn't thinking about changing the face of global politics, just about bringing peace to one man.
"No, Catherine. I need you to renounce Christianity."
"What? All that I've said to you... has meant nothing?"
"I think you're a marvelous person. You don't need Christ to be marvelous."
"The numbers of Christ are growing, not diminishing. How little you understand me," I said bitterly, filled up with the ruins of an expectation I didn't even know I had.
"Catherine, you've been splendid so far. You've solidified my hold on the Romans by making a fool of Constantinus." He paused. I could tell he was steeling himself. "But Rome is not enough. My enemies will set the Empire against its center. You are the key. Do you really think a dead man is enough to create a worldwide religion? No. For that they need a living goddess."
"Ridiculous! The point is that Christ is not dead."
"Christ is not holding court at Rome!" shouted Maxentius. Then he calmed himself. "They're painting you."
"Who?"
"They're painting you in their temples. The Christians."
I laughed. "I went to churches all over your Empire. I could hardly get the elders to even listen to me."
"Yes, well, your timing was off. Right behind you, all along, was word of Constantinus. You forgot to mention him to your elders, didn't you?"
"He was irrelevant."
Maxentius laughed. "If only that were so! How I admire you. You held the key in your hand but you wouldn't use it."
"They must let me in of their own accord," I answered, responding purely to the metaphor. "But what of Constantinus?"
"He is the saviour of your people."
"Ha! You are a fount of blasphemies."
"He allows Christians in his armies. He has the Christian mandate. And you know who gave it to him? You did."
"A lie."
"Yes, and Romans know it. But not Christians. They won't give up their saviour so easily."
"He is not our saviour!" I said, resenting the need to state the obvious.
"All right, then. He's your captain."
"There is no room in Christianity for captains."
"And how about a goddess?"
"Certainly not!"
"Then you must get out of it."
"I am not a goddess."
"They are worshiping images of you on Christian altars."
"No!"
"Denounce them, Catherine. It's the only way to save your new religion."
I considered it. For a moment, I actually considered it. "Sophistry. I will save them by saving them. I will go to them and reform their ways."
"Everywhere you go, they will bow to you. Their ears will be too close to the ground to listen to you. No one understands this better than I. The only way is to make a bold statement here, in Rome. It will echo throughout the Empire."
"Before I am a goddess, or a priestess, I am a simple Christian. If I lose that foundation, I have nothing. Besides, my ministry will be more effective than you think. I can reverse this damnable trend."
"You won't get the chance."
"Why not?"
"Because I won't let you leave Rome. You have two options, Catherine."
"What are they?"
"Renounce Christianity or die."
"You're wrong."
"I am? What? Will you fly away, then?"
"I only have one option."